The Hunting of the Snark

18/06/2012

A garden centre takes the theme a bit too far

Filed under: Snarky — Jeremy Irish @ 22:17
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Recently, my wife and I visited Dobbie’s Garden World in Livingston. I think that branch was opened very recently. And you could tell it was brand-new! The floor was clean, the layout was modern, and the gents’ had something I’d never seen before in my life:

A row of urinals, several of which are shaped and coloured like flowers

So glad there was nobody else there

I would say they must be ‘flower pots’.

– The Snark

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29/03/2011

The aliens have littered

Filed under: Snarky — Jeremy Irish @ 21:35
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I went out to the shops last week and saw this object sitting on the busy footpath in front of our house:

A discarded empty crisp pack of Space Raiders

Take us to your litter

As I continued on, three thoughts went through my head.

  1. Ick.
  2. Space Invaders… My wife was just showing me some cookies she’d seen online decorated with a ‘Space Invaders’ theme.
  3. Crisp packs sitting on the ground like this really are space invaders! (Ooh… deep… clever…)

It later turned out that the product is actually called ‘Space Raiders’ rather than ‘Space Invaders’, probably for fairly good reasons. So not quite as clever. Oh, well. Still works.

I decided I would snap a picture, write a post and then pick up that package. Plus a very dead umbrella nearby.

A child's ruined umbrella apparently resembling a frog

Amphibious landing

Plus a glove (or possibly a severed Muppet hand) that had been abandoned in our garden since well before the thaw—seriously, a month at least.

A small, pink, furry, fetid glove

Unrequited glove

At first, I was just going to bin it, because I figured, it’s never been reclaimed, and who would really want the ugly thing back? Then I thought maybe I should ask the neighbours in case it belonged to one of their kids, never mind how ugly it was. Then I thought it must be really un-hygienic as well as ugly, so the best idea was to toss it after all.

So there we go. I was inspired to clear away three pieces of litter. My blog has done its first actual good deed in the world.

– The Snark

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